trashy

and crosseyed

im quitting. i feel better today.
read the pearl. also dietrich bonhoeffer letters.

"when i walk in the yard i get a great deal of pleasure from a small anthill and from the bees in the lime-trees. i sometimes think of the story of peter bamm, who was on a lovely island where he met all kinds of people, good and bad. he dreamt in a nightmare that a bomb might come and destroy everything and the first thing that occurred to him was what a pity it would be for the butterflies. prison life brings home to one how nature carries on uninterruptedly it's quiet, open life and it gives one quite a special- perhaps sentimental attitude towards animal and plant life, except that my attitude towards the flies in my cell remains very unsentimental"

i wish i could have known him in real life.