april 25th 2008

it is my real birthday today, i'm young, i'm nineteen. yeah i'm nineteen 19 999999teeeeeennnnn teeeeen not 22 i'm still a teenager yeah teenager teenager teenager not even twenty. don't know anything, haven't been through anything, don't know anyone, so naive, innocent, ignorant. young! alive! and ready to curl up in this comforter next to this space heater and sleep off the next 10 years and skip over the part where you talk into my disappointed ears. because i'd rather nap. anyway i can do what i want. i was 18 yesterday. eighteen! that is so young! remember yesterday! when i was 18! ugh, shut up!

sleeping now. watch this. chris conley being great when he was so young! probably eighteen! probably twelve maybe!



ps list of things that i miss and will be missing harder in the coming weeks:
monicque
the gronseths
collin
carly
bike rides
kashi
loree
moms jokes
dads laughs
poor richards pizza with tomato and avocado swap
my blanket
food in general
pikes peak smiling
not being alone
blah blah blah

more from the

party. by the way i made it to washington safely. 

i am

missing my home already. my windowsill lined with coffee cups and my floor scattered with letters and polaroids and clothes and journals and records and half finished projects. 

very sad about leaving my vinyl. 

of course my family and friends are the ones i really don't want to think about leaving.

projects left to finish: 

finish sewing up nyc shirt, fixing buttons on red jacket, making journals for two lovely ladies that i know, finishing the quilt, putting music from vinyl on my computer using usb, recording stephanie and i singing that song we know by heart very loudly(we sang it for rence), searching for the components of my dad's birthday present (he is 50!), learning that one rilokiley song on electric chord organ, drawing for matthew, finding the koala i drew for katie, painting for my mother, and finishing several scarves that i promised. 

i am a bad friend. 

favorite place ! 

good bye colorado

ps

here is stuff
from the last few weeks

stick and pokes with julia

vegan dinner at kaylas

premier tattoo



and my favorite, visiting my great aunt and her puppies, bridgette and chouquette

ok good bye

bday

hey im still under twenty one

let's dance

unwell

all day so stayed home from work which is not a good thing at all

but i feel terrible

that is 60 dollars off of my pay check

i've been watching edie sedgwick, courtney love, bob dylan, and andy warhol interviews 

all morning and old films that don't make any sense

my brain feels like it's in a vice

last night i dreamed that i was so sick that i kept collapsing and passing out 

in different places. once was on an elevator, once was outside while i was 

walking and i just fell, but it didn't hurt when i hit the ground, i couldn't feel anything. 

it was so strange, after i passed out, my brain was still awake, but i couldn't move any 

part of my body, like i was dead, and i knew i was dead but i could still comprehend 

what was happening, and i wasn't scared at all. 

any way i would like to get better soon because vegan dinner is tonight plus 

i feel so useless just laying here

 

april second

I've had a good week and i'm very excited to move and blah blah blah watch these





and this is the cutest video of the month.


ps i wasn't cold last night! so nice